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lljay  留言于2017-04-04 07:04:52 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.08) |
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1、孙悟空和唐僧相亲
悟空和唐僧一起上某卫视非诚勿扰,悟空上台,24盏灯全灭。理由:1.没房没车只有一根破棍. 2.保镖职业危险.3.动不动打妖精,对女生不温柔. 4.坐过牢,曾被压五指山下500年。唐僧上台，哗!灯全亮。 理由:1.公务员； 2.皇上兄弟，后台最硬 3.精通梵文等外语 4.长得帅 5.最关键一点：有宝马！
2、都是葫芦娃惹的祸
今天刚刚和姐姐听完葫芦娃（学习需要），里面有一句“妖精放了我爷爷”这一句词，听了好几遍后匆匆和姐姐跑出书房。那时外婆和爷爷坐的很近，然后我随口一句“妖精放了我爷爷”。Oh no!我一生都不会忘记那时爸爸妈妈看我的眼神！！！
3、如果有来生……
如果有来生，我不做你的任何人，我就做你的手机。那样你就会每天把我捧在手里，如果有一天你匆忙间把我忘在哪里了，你定会着急的四处寻找我，不是我粘着你，而是你根本离不开我，你若敢欺负我，我便死机给你看！
4、钥匙那么多，肯定年轻有为是个领导
小王是单位一普通员工，钥匙链上只有家里和办公室的钥匙。一天，在街上用钥匙开车锁，听到旁边两个妇女小声说：“男人要是不当官，一般钥匙链上的钥匙都比较少，当官的有权，钥匙肯定比较多。” 小王是个虚荣心很强的人，听后就在钥匙链上多挂了几把钥匙。 果然几天后上街，再用钥匙开车锁时，就听旁边有人小声说：“年纪不大，钥匙那么多，肯定年轻有为是个领导。” 小王听后，非常得意。于是他在自己的钥匙链上，又多挂了几把钥匙。 再次上街开车锁，小王故意把钥匙链摘下来，看到他钥匙链上那么多钥匙，旁边又有人议论道：“这个人这么多钥匙，一定是个仓库保管员。”
5、这是我爸爸写的
老师发下作文本时，问一学生：“你爸今年才40岁，怎么参加了二战呢？”该生答：“那是我爷爷。”“可作文题目是《我的爸爸》。”“没错，这是我爸爸写的。”“滚犊子”
6、那请你不要影响我过节！
女儿给妈妈说：“母亲节快乐。”妈妈说：“你快乐我才会快乐。” 女儿说：“那如果我不快乐呢？” 妈妈停顿了下，说：“那请你不要影响我过节！”
7、重点是兰博基尼！
有人疯狂追求了你3年，有的人默默对你好了两年，有人体贴照顾了你1年，还有的人喜欢你却从未说。但你无论多么感动多么开心，就是没在一起；可是莫名有一人，只相识一个月、见了两次面、讲了几句话， 你就决定在一起了。或许是缘分，又或许那天阳光正好，他站在阳光下靠在兰博基尼上很帅。
8、没结婚的像结婚的一样同居
如今，没结婚的像结婚的一样同居，结婚的像没有结婚的一样分居；动物像人一样穿着衣服，人像动物一样露着肉；小孩子像大人一样成熟，大人像小孩子一样幼稚；女人像男人一样爷们，男人像女人一样娘们；没钱的像有钱的一样装富，有钱像没钱的一样装穷；情人像夫人一样四处招摇，夫人像情人一样深入简出~
9、晨练见一姑娘，貌似没穿文胸
晨练见一姑娘，貌似没穿文胸。 站定抖动 双肩，胸前波涛澎湃。看的我鼻血流了一 地，忍不住问：妹啊！丰胸呢？姑娘：“不 是丰胸，是丰乳！是为了以后奶水充足。 看现在这形势，奶粉是指望不上了，就得 靠自己了！”
10、小明是一个疑神疑鬼的人
小明是一个疑神疑鬼的人，他搬了一个新家，这天他又开始疑神疑鬼，他幻想墙壁里是不是有尸体，于是他用一个钉子在墙壁抠洞，抠了一会儿，他拿开钉子，用眼睛看那个洞，他看到了一个眼睛，他很害怕，突然那眼睛的主人说话了“隔壁的，你干啥掏俺家墙
11、儿子，放轻松，别紧张
高考前几天，老爸告诉我:“儿子，放轻松，别紧张，好好考，我已经找好了关系，虽然后台很硬但是也要走一遍程序。”我点点头:“老爸你放心吧，我会好好发挥的，对了，找的谁啊？”“南海观世音菩萨。
12、跟女朋友去她家，第一次见她父母
跟女朋友去她家，第一次见她父母，中午吃饭的时候她父母一人给我一个红包。吃过饭聊了会天，就走了。出来女朋友得看看红包里面装多少钱，打开一看一个红包一张纸，一个写了“滚”另一个写了“蛋”。。。。。。
13、换了新发型的老总，面带桃花
换了新发型的老总，面带桃花，精神抖擞的来到办公室，我不大自然的瞧着他的前卫造型，老总热切又得意的对我说，夏天剃光头好，洗头膏也省了，热了直接用抹布擦擦完事儿，而且不管多大的风也不会凌乱我的发型儿，面带微笑的我默默在心里低估着，您不用眉毛也刮光的。
14、今天起的比较晚，打车去上班
今天起的比较晚，打车去上班，下车时发现不够钱付车费，好在附近有提款机，于是我跟司机师傅说我去取钱，他同意了。我问道：“你不怕我跑了吗？你应该提出扣押手机啥的！”师傅：“那我要带着你手机跑了呢？”我：“我用手机给你的车牌拍过照了。”师傅：“可是你手机不是要押在我这吗？”我：“对啊！”师傅：“小伙子赶紧去取钱吧，你这智商我信得过！”r。。
15、自习不准戴耳机听歌!
高中晚自习，一美女同学穿个阔领T恤 伏案写字，只见我们数学老师叔叔快速 冲过去，猛地拉掉了缠在她脖上的黑 线：“自习不准戴耳机听歌!” 那美女脸 都黑了：“报告老师，那是胸罩带子……”
16、一直觉得《西游记》有个漏洞
一直觉得《西游记》有个漏洞：既然唐僧肉吃完长生不死，他为什么不咬自己一口？这样西天取经妖魔鬼怪都是浮云了～然后行李都不用带啦～反正其他四个徒弟也随时能找到吃的。后来想明白了，觉得吴承恩设计的缜密——和尚不能吃肉。
17、独特视角的古今混搭冷笑话
曹操：快快打探，我方还剩多少人马?
蒋干：只剩高校学生那么多了!
曹操：哈哈，天无绝人之路啊，我们尚可一战，再去打探!
蒋干：哎呀主公不好，我方人马只剩高校MM那么多了！
曹操(跌坐)：天亡我也，看来只能速速北归了，快快再去打探！
蒋干(一会，干回来伏曹身上痛哭)：555……
曹操：如何？
蒋干(哽咽)：主公，我方兵马只剩高校PPMM那么多了！
曹操仰天长叹：嗨，这样说来，我方已全军覆没了…速速逃命吧。。。
18、同事会以为你一直没换！！
表哥在一公司上班…一日老板找到他。 老板：小张，以后穿袜子注意点。 表哥：注意什么？ 老板：不要周一穿白袜子，周二穿灰袜子，周三穿黑袜子。 表哥：为什么？ 老板：同事会以为你一直没换！！
19、干嘛用别人的儿子？
妈妈在厨房干活，喊我把垃圾倒了。我不大愿意，因为爸爸闲着，便嘟囔了一句：“自己的老公不用，用别人的老公。”妈妈回头瞥了我一眼，说：“自己的儿子不用，干嘛用别人的儿子？”
20、你上网学点好东西行不行。
鄙人资深宅。前几年我老妈对我说，宅男，出去逛逛公园去。。当时我很诧异，宅男这种词，作为50后的老妈都能知道，可真是不容易。直到前几天，我老妈对我说：喂，那个屌丝，出来帮我干点活。。。亲妈唉，你上网学点好东西行不行。 |
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UCLA Center for Chinese Studies 留言于2017-04-04 05:54:26 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.08) |
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The Rise of Therapeutic Governing in China
Thursday, April 06, 2017, 12:15 PM - 1:30 PM,
352 Haines Hall, UCLA
Talk by Li Zhang, UC Davis
This talk explores how and why has psychological intervention gradually become a critical tool of managing the population and governing society in postsocialist China. It argues that psychological counselors and experts are becoming a new form of authority, an indispensible part of creating and managing knowable and stable subjects for the military, the police, schools, and enterprises. The central concept, “therapeutic governing,” refers to the adoption of the therapeutic ethos, techniques, and perspective to improve the management of the work force and to help individuals cope with life in the rapidly changing world. The talk examines what drives local authorities to pursue this change, and how therapeutic governing takes on a different character and significance given China’s unique path of economic reform, socialist legacies, and interface with global capitalism and culture. I suggest that despite the danger of psychologizing social and economic problems, the meshing of therapeutic practices and care with flexible governing techniques has come to be seen by some as an experiment of a new style of governing—“kindly governance,” which is based on the notion of humanism (renxinhua) to contrast with the past socialist rule based on class struggle and coercion.
Li Zhang is Professor of Anthropology and Interim Dean of Social Sciences at the University of California-Davis. She was a 2008 John Simon Guggenheim Fellow and the President of the Society of East Asian Anthropology (2013-15). Her research concerns the cultural, spatial, political, and psychological repercussions of market reforms and postsocialist transformations in China. She is the author of two award-winning books: Strangers in the City (Stanford 2001) and In Search of Paradise (Cornell 2010), and the co-editor of Privatizing China, Socialism from Afar (Cornell 2008). Her current project explores an emerging psychological counseling movement and how it reshapes Chinese people's understandings of selfhood, well-being, and governing.
UCLA Center for Chinese Studies
11381 Bunche Hall, Los Angeles, CA 90095
Tel: (310) 825-8683 Fax: (310) 206-3555
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USC U.S.-China Institute 留言于2017-04-02 15:13:24 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.08) |
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The USC U.S.-China Institute presents a talk by USC Professor Emerita Charlotte Furth on her adventures in Beijing teaching young Chinese scholars about America.
Opening to China: A Memoir of Normalization, 1981-1982
Date: Thursday, April 6, 2017, 4:00-5:30pm
Location: Annenberg School for Communication & Journalism, ASC 204, USC
Cost: Free, please register here.
In 1981 an American historian of China, Professor Charlotte Furth, travelled to Beijing to teach young Chinese scholars about America. Professor Furth's year-long adventures, captured in this lively memoir, tell of classroom encounters, bureaucratic entanglements, expat frustrations, unlikely friendships, and misunderstandings both comic and grave. Her sponsor, the Fulbright program of academic exchange, had just revived after thirty years of the Cold War, and carried with it American hopes for a new era of cooperation between China and the United States. Her students were shaped by the Communist revolution, schooled in its political disciplines, and torn between thirst to experience the outside world at last and anxiety about what lay ahead in a post-Mao future.
Charlotte Furth is Professor Emerita of Chinese History at the University of Southern California. Before moving to USC in 1989, she spent two decades on the faculty of California State University at Long Beach. The book based on her Stanford PhD dissertation, Ting Wen-chiang: Science and China's New Culture, was published by Harvard East Asian Monograph Series in 1970. A Flourishing Yin: Gender in China's Medical History (University of California Press, 1999) was awarded the "Women in Science" prize by the History of Science Society in 2001. For her scholarship and service to the profession, including work as journal editor and on several important edited volumes, she was honored for "Distinguished Contributions to Asian Studies" by the Association for Asian Studies in 2012.
USC U.S.-China Institute
213-821-4382
uschina@usc.edu |
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Xilin Art Academy 留言于2017-04-02 14:33:10 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.08) |
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希林第十二届灯节游园会 2017 Xilin Lantern Festival
April 29, Saturday, 2017
1. 游园会 Games & Activities Fair 2:00 - 4:30 Open to the public
2. 文艺演出 Variety Show 5:30 pm
Ticket Price: $10, $15, $20, $30
CCC Yellow Box Auditorium
1635 Emerson Lane, Naperville, IL 60540
现代舞台、梦幻舞美、鼓震云天
歌声优美高亢、舞蹈清新欢快、功夫矫健潇洒
原生态、古典、现代、民族
融合不同的艺术表现形式
带给观众的是超强的艺术享受！
Xilin Asian Community
1163 E. Ogden Ave., Suite 300A, Naperville, IL 60563 |
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中南财经政法大学 留言于2017-03-31 01:53:16 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.08) |
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尊敬的美国华裔教授专家网
中南财经政法大学由教育部、财政部和湖北省人民政府三方共建，是中华人民共和国教育部直属的一所以经济学、法学、管理学为主干 ，兼涵哲学、文学、史学、理学、工学、艺术学等九大学科门类的全国重点大学，是国家“211工程”、“985工程优势学科创新平台”重点建设院校，入选“教育部人文社科重点研究基地”、“国家建设高水平大学公派研究生项目”、“卓越法律人才教育培养计划”。 为实现科教兴国、人才强国，我们正向“高水平、有特色人文社科类研究型大学”而奋斗，学校决定现面向全球公开招聘各层次人才，诚邀海内外有志之士加盟！有请您或教育处同事将我校2017年诚聘海内外优秀人才公告发布在使（领）馆相关网站栏目中，期盼更多学者浏览为国效力！
感谢您们大力支持
中南财经政法大学人事处部
（027）88386907
whxyrsc@126.com |
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VSL 留言于2017-03-31 01:21:04 |
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评论：包容万物 善知进退 |
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人生，择善而交
择真善人而交，择真君子而处。
人生中，观众向来比朋友多。观众只会让人从视觉上舒服，朋友却会让你内心感动。
朋友不是天天见面，吃喝玩乐、相互吹捧；而是懂你，在精神上、灵魂上支持你、鼓励你、帮助你，在你有所不足时，指正你。
肤浅的人，交的是观众；上进的人，交的是朋友。真正的朋友，不是只给你掌声和赞美。
不要拒绝真诚的话，更不要拒绝一颗真诚的心。人与人，一场缘；心与心，一段交流。
朋友，需要的不是数量，而是质量，与有品位、人品好的人相处才能提高自己。
关心，不需要甜言蜜语，真诚就好；友谊，不需要朝朝暮暮，记得就好；问候，不需要语句优美，真心就好；爱护，不需要刻意的形式，温暖就好。
真正的朋友不是不离左右，而是默默关注，或者，一句贴心的问候，一句有力的鼓励。
是否友情，要看相处；能否永恒，要看时间。
日子久了，与你无缘的自会走远，与你有缘的自会留下。
做一个坦荡的人，做一个真诚的人，做一个善良的人，做一个有尺度的人。人活着，一份自然再加一份真，人要善良，但更要有尺度，还要辨得清是非。
不是所有的人都能成为朋友，也不是所有的人都值得你付出真心或是发善心。做人不要斤斤计较，但要有原则。他人有过，不究；于人有恩，不念。
来来往往皆是过客，相伴同行才是朋友。一生中的朋友有很多，而真正的朋友却没有几个。真正的朋友会有一份笃定不移的信任。
人要低头做事，更要睁眼看人，择真善人而交，择真君子而处。
人的一生，面临一个又一个的选择，包括选择朋友。
交朋友，只是彼此间选择友好，而不是选择某个依靠。朋友间相互支持没有错，但不能把朋友当成精神支柱。人间的缘，聚聚散散，能一直走下去的少之又少。
所以，无论何时，都要有一颗独立的心，假如有一天分开，也不会失去自我，找不到方向。有多少好朋友，从无话不谈，到无话可谈，不是情不在，而是经不起风雨。交友需真诚，对事需轻淡，处世需独立。
人活着，圈子不要太大，容得下自己和一部分人就好；朋友不在于多少，自然随意就好。
有些人，只可远观不可近瞧；有些话，只可慢言不可说尽。
朋友，淡淡交，慢慢处，才能长久；感情，浅浅尝，细细品，才有回味。朋友如茶，需品；相交如水，需淡。
一份好的缘分，是随缘；一份好的感情，是随性。相交莫强求，强求不香；相伴莫若惜，珍惜才久。
有时候，人需要的不是物质的富有，而是心灵的慰藉；不是甜言蜜语的左右，而是相通的懂得。
关乎于情，因为动心；感动于心，因为认真。一段话入心，只因触碰心灵；一行泪流下，只因瓦解脆弱。
人生中有朋友是幸福，有知己是难得，有知心是难求难得。风雨时，才能见真情；平淡中，才能见真心。
不相对，已然在心；不诉情，已然懂得。真心见真情，真情见真人。 |
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Mentoring Institute 留言于2017-03-30 02:14:01 |
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评论：UPDATE - From The Chinese American Professors and Professionals Network (2017 No.07) |
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2017 MENTORING CONFERENCE: CALL FOR PROPOSALS
CONFERENCE DATES: Monday - Friday, October 23 - 27, 2017.
LOCATION: University of New Mexico, Student Union Building. Albuquerque, NM.
CONFERENCE THEME
This year’s conference theme is A Decade of Cultivating an Inclusive Mentoring Community: Developmental Networks for Innovation, Achievement, and Transformation. We seek to facilitate discourse on the effectiveness of developmental networks, and the importance of mentoring and coaching relationships for community building.
WHAT WE ARE LOOKING FOR
We are particularly keen to receive proposals that are informative and relevant to the field of developmental relationships, supported by theory and research. The term developmental networks includes, but is not limited to mentoring, coaching, networking, and sponsorship relationships.
Topics: Mentoring, Coaching, and Leadership.
Strands: STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering & Mathematics), Arts, Humanities, Business, Health Sciences, Education, and others.
We seek proposals that accomplish any of the following:
Builds on the knowledge-base of existing literature pertaining to developmental relationships.
Demonstrates the effectiveness of existing mentoring and coaching programs.
Proposes a methodology or evaluation model for mentoring and coaching relationships.
Suggests new ideas and best practices for successful developmental relationships.
Promotes diversity and inclusion, cross-cultural relationships, and innovation.
Presentation Requirements
Accepted presenters must meet the following requirements (please read carefully):
45-Minutes Presentation: Individual/panel sessions are assigned a 45-minute slot; we suggest a TED Talk format for the first 30 minutes of the presentation, 10 minutes for Q&A, and 5 minutes for the session''''s evaluation.
Presentation Paper: Submission of a 5-7-page paper on the topic of your presentation is mandatory. Papers will be peer-reviewed and published in the conference proceedings. In addition to your individual/panel presentation, we strongly suggest to bring a poster to be displayed during the conference poster session. You do not need to write an additional poster paper; however, you will need to submit a Microsoft Power-Point file (template will be provided) with the content of your poster.
Poster Submission: Submission of a 1-2 page paper describing the content of your poster is mandatory. All poster presenters are also required to submit a Microsoft Power-Point file (template will be provided) with the content of your poster.
Presenter Registration Fee: $400
More information on these requirements can be found on our website at [mentor.unm.edu/conference]mentor.unm.edu/conference.
MPORTANT DEADLINES
Abstract Proposal Submission Deadline May 15, 2017
Accepted Proposal Notification May 30, 2017
Last Date to Register as a Peer-Reviewer June 15, 2017
Paper Submission Due June 30, 2017
Peer-Review Process July 1-30, 2017
Peer Reviewed Paper Returned August 1, 2017
Final Paper Submission Due August 30, 2017
Last Date to Register as a Volunteer September 30, 2017
Standard Registration Deadline October 7, 2017
The Mentoring Institute
1716 Las Lomas Rd NE, Albuquerque, NM 87106
(505) 277-1330 |
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